2020 has been a crazy year.... and I frequently have chatted with God about it like "whaaaat"
It's incredible how much has changed this year, both planned and not planned. The adjustment we all had to make with COVID for sure has been the biggest.
Yes it affected our income, our activities, our travel plans & our peace - but we also had some blessings throughout this years storm.
I don't want to ignore the things I'm upset about. I personally feel like I was robbed of so many opportunities to create memories with Seth. We had just enrolled him in gym class, we had his first flight booked to attend Andy's sister's wedding, and we were planning to go on a cruise vacation for our anniversary. My income got cut in half for those students who chose not to continue virtually, I wasn't able to have a recital, and it was the first year in which I had not been able to start any new students. We used to go out to eat and spend time with friends and family. Birthdays and experiences were missed. I feel like for me it was just one year and not that big of a deal in the scheme of things but for my son there was so much in terms of his development, classes & mommy & me activities that I looked forward to doing. Things that would have helped me through this stage of motherhood.
But these were expectations I put in my mind.
If I choose to look at this year through the eyes of my son - it was a pretty awesome year.
It started off with Andy getting his new job, me working 7 days a week, leaving Seth at home with Andy's dad and coming home to lots of baby hugs and kisses. Then everything shifted to us all being at home. And for Seth - that was awesome! I was generally available all the time and he didn't have to watch us go anymore. We took the opportunity to potty train him and put together a learning schedule. Even though his classes changed to virtual, we were still able to do them together and then eventually got to do his gym classes outside. Our home became both an educational school, a hands on restaurant, and an activity filled playground.
We had each other, we were healthy, we were safe. And that's what was important.
So God, thank you for reminding me that while I do have the ability to make plans and take charge of things in my life - ultimately you are the one who is in charge, knows our journey, and lets us grow through tough times. I'm truly grateful for year 2020 and rooting myself in you God when things get uncertain. I know I can rely on and trust in You. While there are many blessings that can come out of tough times, I will continue to do my best to be still and have faith through the duration of the tough times.
